My husband is my favorite person in the world! I can hear my BFF’s groan and gasp with mock offense, but they know it’s true. I love that man like it’s my job- and it is. He is the greatest gift God has ever given me, and I intend to spend my life treating him like it.
I’m not saying we always agree, or that we don’t annoy or aggravate each other- ’cause we do! We each have flaws that are really frustrating to deal with, and occasionally I want to knock him into next week (and he absolutely has to feel that way about me. I know me, after all!) But the vast majority of the time, we really like each other, and we like being together. Today is our anniversary, so I admit to being a bit sappy, but he really is everything I ever wanted and hoped for, and more. We are the most important relationship in our lives, and we invest daily in that relationship because we still want to be head-over-heels in love when we are 90, not just married. We spoil each other with love because that is the marriage we choose to build. It’s not always easy, and I don’t always feel like being kind, or feel like cutting down cottonwood trees all weekend, or feel like sitting on the couch to watch some show I have no interest in, but compromise is required if I want my marriage to flourish, and Superman does so much for all of us all the time!
We are blessed to have found each other, there’s no other way to say it. Our personalities are very similar in some ways and polar opposite in others. We both love to be with friends and have a good time, we love to scuba dive and take naps on the beach, and we love football and hockey. But he’s a relax in front of the tv guy, while I prefer to read a book. He watches a game and can see the play developing and know what’s going to happen, and I just watch the game. I know where every thing of every one of us is at every moment, and he can’t find the parmesan cheese in the fridge. I make all the plans and the reservations, and he happily comes along. He prefers quiet and calm, and I’m music blaring all day.
We don’t do everything perfectly, but we do one thing exceptionally well- we make each other a priority. If you have never read The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman, DO IT! If you have read it, read it again! Every person shows love one way, and receives love one way. It turns out that Superman and I are a match made in Heaven. He shows love how I receive it, and I show love how he receives it, which means it’s natural for us, rather than being out of our element. He speaks directly to my heart, and I hold his hand and snuggle up next to him, and we both feel loved and content. Our friends make fun of us and tell us to get a room because we make googley eyes across the room, kiss and hold hands, and dance when our song comes on no matter where we are. Our kids roll their eyes and fake-barf when we kiss on the couch. But our kids see love, and they see us making each other a priority, they see us fight and reconcile, they hear us speak highly of each other to people, and they see us try. A few years back while driving in the car, out of nowhere Sissay said, “Mom, when I get married I want a man exactly like Superman- except way more patient!” She and I cracked up laughing at her last part of the statement, but her words left a huge impact on me. She sees how he treats me, how he treats all of us, and she sees respect and love- and she wants that for her own life. She wants a marriage like ours, and she wants a husband like him. That is the greatest compliment our kids could ever give!
Our road has not been easy, but it has been sooooo worth it! And through it all, he has been by my side. He was by my side when I was diagnosed with T1D, when we suffered our most devastating losses alone as a couple, when I was in a coma rather than on our honeymoon, when we delivered our 10lb 2oz Little Guy, beaming at me from the audience as I finally earned my degree and walked across that stage, through career changes and the challenges of raising teenagers. He has been by my side every single minute of it, and never wavered. So if I sound like I’m bragging on the guy, I am. His character and his care are worth mention. Happy Anniversary, Babe!